Her Tragedy, Her Recovery
by Mrs. Amaro
Summary: Olivia Benson is deeply upset and bothered that William Lewis, the worst rapist and sadistic human being she's encountered in her 14 years as a detective is free on bail awaiting his retrial. Now he's broken into her apartment to seek revenge on her because she's determined to see him behind bars or dead. Please as always read, review and enjoy!
1. Welcome home Olivia

Does detective Olivia Benson's life hang in the balance of one William Lewis, a vicious and vile rapist? After reading many other creative works I decided to give my take on how season 15 could open. As always please read and review

It was late Sunday afternoon and the pounding rain and forceful winds were finally starting to let up. The sun desperately made an effort to peak through the thick gray clouds that adorned the mid-afternoon sky. It had been raining since yesterday evening. A change up in their weekend plans would never materialize since Mother Nature was in control of the weather. Round tin foil containers that housed half eaten lasagna and manicotti, one garlic bread knot and an empty tin that was once Olivia's greek salad was all that was left on the kitchen counter. Olivia flipped through the channels on the tv, Brian sitting inches from her, cleaned his department issued service revolver. Slivers of light crept through each side of the shade.

"Is that the sun?" Olivia said moving the magazine off her lap that she had started to read before switching on the tv when Brain asked. She walked over to the window and pulled up the cord that raised the shade. "Hey why don't we get outta here and take in a movie?" No answer as she looked at him busy with the rag. "Bri, she called to him sounding a little annoyed most likely stemming from cabin fever since Friday night.

"The game's on soon and it's still raining." He said his eyes glued to his cleaning ways.

"To the contrary, annnnnnd we watched the game yesterday, how about getting out of the apartment and join the rest of the world?"

"Liv, it rained all day yesterday, there was nothing we could do but stay in."

"I know that but the weather is clearing so let's go out." She joined him on the couch stroking his arm. He turned to look at her managing a mere smile then went back to cleaning his weapon. He heard and felt her long sigh.

"Can we catch a late flick after the game?" Olivia looked a tad annoyed.

"A late flick? Have you have forgotten I get up every Monday morning at 5:30 a.m. while you sleep." She crossed in front of him exiting the room. She made her way into the kitchen for a glass of water. As she drank the water her eye caught the corner of a legal envelope that jutted out from underneath what seemed to be unpaid bills. The stamped letters CONFIDENTIAL were in view. She pulled the envelope out and looked startled at first and then she saw the return address. Olivia pulled the letter out and started to read then angrily charged back to the living room with the letter in hand. Brian jumped from his position on the couch when he saw what was tightly grasped in her hand.

"What are you doing Liv?"

"When were you going to tell me that you're the father of Carissa's daughter?" He stood there in front of her, his mouth agape. Any words he tried to muster could not provide any comfort to her right now.

"It was before I met you and when she told me she was pregnant I swore it was Ganzlers and that she was just using me to get back at him so after she had the baby we never talked about it.

"OH, so that makes it alright to keep this-" She tossed the letter at him, both watching it landing at his feet. "This news from me!" Her voice cracked with emotion and her eyes began to grow moist.

"I was going to tell you but this case you're on, it's been taking up all your time this week and I wanted to wait until after the trial and this bastard is put away and you can finally relax!"

"Spare me!" Olivia spied her boots and retrieved them. Zipping them up she looked around for her purse realizing she left it in the kitchen. He put his service weapon down locking the safety on it and went after her but it was no use.

"How old is the little girl?" Olivia asked with her back to him.

"She's 14 months old." Olivia turned to face him with her keys in hand tightly gripped.

"And you knew all this time, you prick." The expression on Brian's face wrinkled and his voice became tense, raised an octave higher than normal.

"I just found out, apparently she put my name on the birth certificate and her parents discovered it when they went through her things so I had no choice I had to take a paternity test. They told me they were going to sue me for child support if I didn't take one."

"This is just great. I can't trust you Brian, you-you hide this from me making up some excuse to wait until I'm relaxed after a case is over. It's bull!" She brushed by him as he reached out for her arm wrapping his fingers at her elbow.

"See Liv when I was going through all that shit with a rape charge over my head you didn't trust me then and I was innocent. This has no bearing on you and doesn't change anything between us."

"The hell it doesn't! Brian-you're a father now! If you couldn't tell me THEN that you were taking a paternity test and that YOU could possibly be this child's father means you weren't waiting until after my case. Truth is you didn't want to tell me. Where is she?"

"That is simply not the case here Liv! She's with her granparents. I'm fighting for custody now that I know I have a daughter."

"Add that to your list of things you kept to yourself!"

"Oh please give me a friggin break! Remember those words you said to me in the hospital? I guess you really haven't changed have you?"

"I don't like people who-especially the ones I'm romantically involved with hiding important information from me. I'm going to go I need some time to decipher all this. I'll call you don't call me."

"I wasn't hidi-Fine Liv whatever you want!"

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo **

It was late Tuesday afternoon when the call came in at 4:30. Second grade detective Nick Amaro was bent over his desk looking dejected as his partner of two years first grade detective Olivia Benson hung up the phone in disgust as to what ADA Raphael Barba just shared with her.

"Don't tell me the dna is inadmissible." Nick said making strong eye contact with his partner.

"Worse." Olivia told him holding her gaze to his. "The judge in her infinite wisdom declared a mistrial."

"You've got to be kidding me!" Cragen clamored. Nick tended to his phone as it alerted him a text message awaited.

"It gets worse, he made bail." Olivia said pushing her hair back sighing heavily.

"Bail? He doesn't have two cents to his name." Fin added reclining back his chair looking just as mesmerized as his colleagues.

"Well it seems he has very giving legal counsel, Vanessa put up his bail."

"That's some real attorney client privilege right there if you ask me." Fin added standing up.

"We'll get him on retrial. " Nick said.

"This guy is beyond lucky." Amanda said coming to the forefront. Olivia looked exasperated at her partner.

"Retrial? If they even let Barba retry him, we have no dna, we have no case Nick!" Everyone in the squad room detected the frustration and sadness in Olivia's voice.

"Ok who wants to go with me and just shoot this son of a bitch?" Amanda piped in.

"Rollins!" her captain gave her a friendly admonishment.

"Don't worry cap'n I'ma take her out and get her a drink. Anyone else up while my wallet still open?" Fin added.

"Uh I can't I have plans." Nick said replying back to the text message.

"Gil and Cynthia?" Amanda asked.

"Yeah, Nick said looking at Olivia who didn't return his look.

"Good for you." Amanda said.

"Liv?" Fin asked as he grabbed his jacket from his chair.

"Uh rain check, I've barely been home all this week."

"Good go home stay there two days." Cragen ordered her.

"Captain I have…"

"Liv that's an order, if you show up for work I'll have you arrested. Amanda passed by with Captain Cragen on her heels, Fin following.

"Night everyone," the captain said.

Nick watched them all go waiting till they were gone. He took a seat beside his partner worrying how she looked right then.

"You alright?" he asked concerned looking intently at her with his warm dark caring eyes.

"Not really." Olivia whispered as she glanced back at Nick for a quick second; a deep frown was imbedded on her lips. She grabbed a stack of papers and placed them in their proper piles. Nick was torn whether to drive her home or make it on time to his evening plans. He stood walking around the back of her gently stroking his hand across her shoulders giving a light squeeze.

"Alright I'll see you in a few, keep your head up ok?" Olivia looked up just as Nick turned and looked back at her. Their gaze was intense, as if his eyes told her _I'm here just say the word. _He paused before taking his next step and when she didn't commit he walked out. Olivia watched until he was out of her line of sight. Somberness fell over her. She knew what she had to do regarding her relationship with Brian. She would deal with him in two days. She returned his call on her way out. He was not in a good mood when she told him she wasn't in the mood to have dinner with him before he had to report for work. Olivia was off for the next few days and didn't want him to stop by in the morning when his shift was finished. She could tell he was hurt by it but she wanted the time to think and be sure she was making the right decision to end the relationship. She didn't even scoff when he was curt saying she was making this out to be more than it was and then hung up on her.

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo **

Olivia stopped at her local market to pick up a few things. When she arrived home she flipped on the entry way light and proceeded to put down her groceries. A noise turned her attention to the living room.

"Hello." She said walking from the kitchen into the living room. Normally she would draw her weapon but numbness had taken over. At first she thought it may be Brian. He had asked the landlord to let him in before when he arrived before her. It ended up being her worst nightmare.

"Welcome home Detective Benson." William Louis said pointing a gun directly at her. Olivia didn't even have time to catch her breath as her heart dropped into her stomach. His grotesque smile wanted to make her vomit just then. He approached closer rubbing the tip of the barrel against her cheek and then he knocked her down onto her couch. He had managed to smash her cell phone and there was no land line in her apartment so all communication was cut off if anyone tried to come to her aid or if Olivia tried to summon emergency personnel. For the next several hours Olivia Benson would suffer the worst treatment she could ever imagine as a detective.

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

William the "Beast" Lewis was tired of the chit chat with Olivia. She possessed a wonderful oral skill that would turn the tables on her perps most of the time but Lewis was much smarter than the average criminal she encountered. When he grew tired of playing cat and mouse games with her it turned physical. First it was a slap to her face then a punch to her jaw for her relentless hassle of him and the disrespect she showed him while interrogating him. A woman's place is squarely behind a man's he reminded her over and over. She pleaded with him to spare her any more pain. He of course laughed it off and continued to verbally abuse her for hours. He lit a cigarette, took a few puffs then burned it into her skin on the back of her hand and then between her cleavage. She sat tied up on her couch sweating with fear as he enjoyed drinking the beers from the six pack that came with his Chinese order. William was coming back for round two and when Olivia saw the box cutter in his hand she openly wept in front of him. The blade was cold to the touch as he slowly slid it under her chin threatening to erase all the beauty she possessed and make her very unattractive looking. He ripped at her blouse pulling it off and running the knife between her breasts cutting her bra loose. Olivia knew if she didn't have the inner strength now she would never have it to be able to survive his brutal torture. He wiped at the blood that was trickling from the corner of her mouth. Olivia turned her head and winced at his touch. She asked for a glass of water and he obliged holding the glass to her mouth. She took a big enough drink and when he took the glass away she spit the water through her teeth albeit the pain that surrounded her jaw and making a forceful stream directly into his eye causing him to moan loudly and throw the glass down shattering it. He palmed his eye where the water stung the inside of his eyeball.

"You bitch! You're going to pay for this!" Olivia mustered enough strength and kicked him square in the crotch hard as he came at her. He groaned and grimaced in pain holding his testicles. Saliva glistened on his lips and dripped down his chin. William wiped away the spit and came at her. Olivia put her feet up in defense and he sliced at the heel of her boot but managed to swipe her thigh leaving a deep gash and with the force of his swing the knife fell out of his hand. He looked to the right of the floor as he spied where it landed then looked back at Olivia laughing at her efforts to save herself. His physical size was no match for her legs trying in vain to ward him off and her thigh was bleeding badly through her jeans. His arms and fists swung hard as he punched her in the ribs repeatedly and kicked her over and over then picking her up he threw her to the floor, her head hitting the coffee table causing another gash to the left temple area. Just then a knock at her apartment door was heard. Lewis picked up his gun from the table pointing it at her. He spoke in an almost whisper.

"Answer it! He demanded her. Olivia was silent not because she chose to but because she couldn't with probable broken ribs and a punctured or collapsed lung. He kicked her feet.

"Answer the fucking door now, he hissed!"

"I can't," she strained just to say that. When she turned her head his way he could see the blood matted to her hair and her teeth and lips were covered with blood and then she closed her eyes. There was chatter outside in the hallway. Lewis walked closer to the door listening. Her elderly neighbor next door stood in front of Olivia's door clutching at her house coat with her hair wrapped in curlers. Two men joined her asking what was going on.

"I don't know if she's home I usually don't see her except in the mornings when I get my paper. I was just getting ready for bed when I heard a loud crash." The woman told to the two gentlemen who lived across the hall in 4C. The taller of the two men banged on her door calling her name.

"Detective Benson, it's Mike Miller from across the hall are you ok, are you home?" When she failed to answer after a few seconds her neighbor reached into his pocket and dialed 911. William walked back to where Olivia lie and leaned over whispering in her ear.

"Lucky for you detective Benson you get a reprieve but they'll never catch me and believe you me I will finish my job here some day when you don't expect it." He left through her bathroom window down the fire escape.

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo **

The barrage of flashing lights from the police cars and the ambulance ricocheted off the buildings. Residents milled about with all the commotion. The paramedics were tending to Olivia as Nick and his captain rushed into her apartment. Officers were taking statements as Amanda and Fin pulled up to a screeching halt jumping out running into her building as well.

"I'll kill this son of a bitch when I catch him." Don Cragen said looking at his senior detective as they lifted her onto the stretcher and placed an oxygen mask around her mouth and nose then secured the safety belts across her abdomen and chest. She was in severe pain and still remained unconscious.

"Get in line, Nick said through clenched teeth looking at his captain following the paramedics out. Nick rode with his partner holding her hand.

"Hang in there Liv you're gonna be ok." He tried to smile but all he had right now was very deep hatred in his heart for William Lewis and a huge amount of guilt. He knew something was off with his partner when he left the precinct 7 hours earlier.

Outside her building Fin, Amanda and the captain talked. "Has anyone called Brian?" Amanda asked.

"I will." Captain Cragen told her.

When Brian arrived at the Emergency Room he saw all of her colleagues waiting anxiously for news.

"Thanks for calling Amanda. How is she?"

"She's in surgery right now we don't know anything." Nick said filling his paper cup with water.

"Where's Lewis now?" Brian asked angrily.

"He's on the run but there's a massive manhunt being arranged as we speak." Fin told him.

"Shouldn't you all be helping locate him?" Brian said with disdain for his former colleagues. Sergenat John Munch rushed through the ER doors to where they all sat and stood, Don Cragen was against the wall with his suit coat folded over his arms looking Brian's way but not saying a word. Nick stood against the water dispenser letting Brian's comment pass. Right now he felt as if he could put his fist through Brian's mouth but decided his partner was first and foremost on his mind Fin and Amanda sat side by side and they all gave Brian a look as well.

"Right now finding out about Liv is priority, we'll find him don't worry." Amanda told him. Nick glared at Olivia's boyfriend crushing his Dixie paper cup after downing his water. They filled in Munch who then took Brian aside.

"She's going to make it, if we know our Liv she's a survivor first." Brian Cassidy continued to stare at the floor with his ex-partner's hand loosely hung around his shoulder. When the doctor emerged they all converged on him.

"Her spleen ruptured and she's suffered several broken ribs and a collapsed lung. She's in a lot of pain but resting comfortably so I suggest little as possible right now with visitation but you can go in and see her."

"Thank you doctor," Don Cragen said touching his shoulder.

"Nick, Brian you both go." The captain told them. When they entered her room she was sleeping, peacefully they had hoped but knew better and with the aid of strong pain medication Olivia lie there with her temple area bandaged and stitched and a ventilator helping her breathe.

Nick motioned to Brian to go up to her first.

"Liv, I'm here. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you, I should have been but you're going to be ok after a while. He stayed a few minutes caressing her hand that didn't have the burn mark then before backing away from her he planted a soft kiss on her forehead, his lips lingering against her skin. "Liv." Nick walked up to the bed and picked up her hand placing his lightly around it. "Hey there partner the doctor sad you are one tough cop. Everyone's here from the squad and they want to come in and see you too. You know these gowns are not very flattering so you gotta hurry up and get outta here and get dressed the way you're used to. I'll be here till they discharge you, I'm your wing man and I'm never leaving you again." He smoothed his thumb across her forehead looking at her bruised cheeks and swollen lip then gave her fingers a light squeeze and then he smiled feeling her finger make an weak effort to try and touch his back.

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo **

After her squad was done visiting Amanda, Fin and Cragen joined the task force that was on the hunt for William Lewis. All bus terminals and airports were on lock down and every single cab in the city had a description of him within minutes of finding Olivia badly bruised and beaten in her apartment. New Jersey port authority and surrounding jurisdictions had been on high alert as well. One thing was certain with the NYPD and the Special Victims Unit. William Lewis would be caught dead or alive but they suspected he wouldn't go peacefully and that it would end up with him succumbing to his death by the police. He was armed and considered highly dangerous.

Nick and Brian both spent the night in Olivia's room. Neither slept and every moan or move from Olivia had them both sprung like a leak seeing to her. Nick had to remember his place and let Brian take the reins. He was unaware of the recent problems between his partner and her boyfriend. When Olivia finally did open her eyes the next day the pain limited her ability to speak.

"Hey beautiful I'm here, Nick's here too." Nick stood to the right of her bed and Brian to the left.

"Morning partner." Olivia first looked at Nick. His image was a little blurry until her eyes totally focused on him and a tiny smile appeared on her lips. Brian took notice of this. She moaned and clicked her pain dispenser that administered morphine. She would go in and out of consciousness as both men stood vigil. Olivia's eyes flickered open and she mumbled the name Lewis.

"They got him Liv he's dead and he will never ever again hurt anyone." Brian looked across the bed at Nick and his declaration. They hadn't caught him yet he thought so why would her partner tell her that? Brian swung his head motioning to Nick to step back. Nick followed him outside of her room.

"What are doing Amaro why in the hell would you tell her that?"

"She needs to hear something comforting right now and believe me if it takes the rest of my career I will hunt him down and kill him myself!" His phone rang so he answered it.

"He's down suspect is dead." He heard Fin say into the receiver.

"Good best news of the morning." Nick told him.

"Lewis is dead." He brushed by Brian and went back into Olivia's room leaving Brian looking at the back of Nick. Olivia was released from the hospital two days later. A home health care nurse came by once a day to change out her morphine bag and help her with toiletries. Her team also took turns visiting and making meals for her to eat.

"Thanks Nick for everything, you're a great partner."

"I know just concentrate on getting back out there with me, it's lonely going solo." He smiled his thousand watt smile at her as he caressed her knee under the covers. Her lips arced looking back at him "You need anything before I go, more water, hot tea, something to nibble on?"

"A cup of tea would be good thanks."

"Coming right up." A knock at the door had him deviating from his route from her bedroom to the kitchen to front door.

"Cassidy." Nick looked at the bouquet of flowers in his hand.

"Nice to see you to Amaro." Nick moved aside to let Brian in. Olivia had been home two days now and Brian was just showing his face. This made Nick wonder.

"I was going to make her a cup of tea but since you're here now it's all yours."

"Yeah ok."

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo **

"Hi," she said as she saw the vase of flowers in his hand and tea in the other.

"Hey you. These are for you and so is this." He placed the vase beside her bed side table and sat down carefully not to make too many waves in her mattress and cause pain.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Look Liv I'm sorry I didn't come by yesterday your first day home. Your squad has been great taking turns nursing you back to health."

"I don't know what I would have done without them."

"Yeah. I'm sorry Liv about everything and I want us to talk when you have your strength back." She patted his hand.

"Brian I'm sorry too but there's nothing really to talk about. I was very happy we fit so well, in the beginning at least but we sort of started growing apart.

"Liv please don't say it."

"I have to I'm sorry I'm not going to lead you on. I know you've discovered some great news recently and I just thought we didn't keep things that important from one another but we're different now Brian we like different things and want different things out of life. It's not like it was when we first started dating."

"It can be like that again I'll change." She licked her lips and her eyes grew wet. Her words strained with difficulty.

"Brian we both know we change for ourselves first not for someone else because they say so."

"So it's over just like that?" Olivia couldn't bring any words to say, she just nodded sadly. He wiped away the tear that slowly trickled from her eye to her cheek.


	2. All dressed up & no place to go

**Thank you all for your reviews as always you guys rock! I intended this to be just a one shot but since some of you asked me to continue I thought I'd oblige but I'm not sure how many chapters it will be. Have a busy summer ahead of me :)**

Does detective Olivia Benson's life hang in the balance of one William Lewis, a vicious and vile rapist? After reading many other creative works I decided to give my take on how season 15 could open. As always please read and review

Two weeks after her horrible ordeal Olivia returned to work but she wasn't quite ready to get back to the beat with her unit just yet. Before she could return to full duty she needed to be cleared by psych services. Her ribs were slowly healing but still quite painful in dressing and her bruises were starting to turn a yellowish brown, a clear sign her jaw, wrists and chest were in the healing stages. Coughing was still a chore as she had to hold a pillow to her chest when the urgent need came to cough. Her left lung that had suffered a partial collapse had healed nicely and she was done with her in home oxygen treatments. No more pain medication was needed to aid in her rest/sleep. The surgeon who stitched her head up left no trace of evidence where he sewed the wound together.

Her scent always set off his membranes and when he got a whiff of her he turned to see the lovely Olivia Benson, his partner, walk in with coffee and copy of the NY Times in hand as always accompanying her in her daily arrival.

"Welcome back stranger you were missed." Nick said as he pushed back his chair as she entered the squad room. Flowers adorned her desk signed by everyone who worked on the 4th floor. She smiled at him at the others as she walked slowly to her desk looking at the beveled glass vase that held a beautiful arrangement of pink, white and yellow roses, red and yellow carnations, white and purple gerbera daisies and hot pink lilies. Nick rose and opened his arms welcoming his partner back. He was careful not to squeeze her, only a light wrap of his strong arms and his fingertips encircled her. His hug felt good better than the pain medicine that temporarily erased the deep trauma she endured. Olivia quickly remembered the last time she smelled his cologne and after shave was when they hugged right before she left for her Christmas vacation last year. His skin was warm and smooth, fresh evidence he shaved recently. His cheek brushed against her hers and she felt his lips gently touch her cheek right below her ear. Olivia felt a slight tingle to a sensitive spot right below her left ear lobe. His lips were soft and his breath warm with a hint of cinnamon she noted, his preference of toothpaste of course. Her eyes were closed as she rested her chin on his shoulder listening to the footsteps of the others coming up to welcome her back.

"It's good to see you back Liv, Fin said lightly touching her shoulder as she opened her eyes to see him standing in front of her. She felt Nick's hands slide down her back exiting at her waist. Olivia lifted her head slowly and smiled at Fin, his arm slowly slid down hers taking her hand in his.

"I'm still holding on to that rain check you wrote me."

"I'm all for it as soon as I can sit without grimacing." Fin smiled backing away letting Amanda and Munch come forward.

"Glad your back Liv." Amanda told her holding her hands in hers.

"Thank you. Where's the captain?" Olivia asked letting go of Amanda's hands looking past her to his empty office.

"He's in San Diego, his sister passed away." Munch added.

"Peacefully or?" Olivia asked Munch.

"In her sleep," he told her. Olivia's look of sullenness made the conversation change quickly as her colleagues took witness to her expression. She replayed a conversation she had with her captain last year. They had just finished a two week marathon case that took a toll on all of them.

_Nick, Olivia, Amanda, Munch and Fin had gathered at their local favorite watering hole to de-stress after 2 grueling weeks of finding and a serial rapist. After a couple of rounds of drinks Olivia remained and as usual Nick was the last to leave. His hand slid across her back offering a ride but she declined. "Thanks but I live just a few blocks away." He said goodnight and passed the captain on his way out. Captain Donald Cragen took Nick's stool next to his senior detective. They were the only two at the bar, well not counting the regular drunk at the end of the counter who usually fell asleep before the 11'o clock news. The bartender wiped the counter in front of them keeping an eye on their drinks, ready to refill if asked._

"_She's my only sibling I have left. We were never close growing up; we sort of migrated back in touch after our parents had passed and I had just gotten my first command with Narcotics."_

"_Tragedies always bring people together. After entering the police academy it was then I found out what is was like to have a mother who cared." Olivia told him._

"_I'm glad you two found your way back. Family is important."_

"_Agree," Olivia said holding her glass up. They clinked their glasses. "What's important now is that you did find one another again and you see one another once year."_

"_I just feel guilty like I should be there."_

"_You said your brother-in-law is there and is taking great care of her. It's not easy havng a loved one so sick and we're so far away." _

"_You know Liv I only have two years to go and I will have 40 years on the force and I'm thinking San Diego is where I'm going to retire."_

"_Out grew New York huh?"_

"_Nothings left here for me anymore, I mean Marge is buried here but Nadine is my family and I want to be near her."_

"_I couldn't agree more with you and even if she doesn't recognize you any longer she thinks of you differently when she sees you, someone who came all this way to see her so what if your Bob or John to her, and 75 degrees year round, no snow to shovel, precipitation at a minimum, yeah I'd take San Diego any day over New York to enjoy your golden years."_

"_You forgot to mention earthquakes." He smiled as he took a sip of his ice tea with lemon. Olivia leaned to the right of her captain and whispered._

"_For you- there won't be any." She smiled and took the last sip of her cabernet. _

"**Liv **I know this is your first day back so when you feel ready psych services wants to sit down with you." Munch looked at her.

"Yeah I'll get that done before I leave today." She told him.

"Ok people let's get the days order of business, Munch called out walking back to his desk.

""Amanda and I are going back to Hells Kitchen to re-interview the boss. Seems after he slept off his drunken stupor and was looking at tampering of evidence and 5 years at Sing Sing, his memory has come back…shocker."

"And the two employees who found Melanie, their alibies check out but both have rap sheets as long as the NJ Turnpike so we'll squeeze them a little harder, maybe they'll just decide to come clean when we tell them they can have adjoining cells." Amanda added. Sergeant Munch looked next at Nick down the end of his glasses.

"Uh I'm going to sweat the hump in our cage a little more because he was dumb enough to smile at the surveillance camera when he dropped his load last night." Nick said grabbing his folder and handing it to his partner on his way to the interrogation room giving Olivia a warm look. Olivia looked at the traffic in front of her wishing she was part of the commotion but instead she pulled out her chair and settled in reading over cases doing her best to get caught up. Nick returned after a half hour with the grease ball but getting absolutely nowhere. He stood next to her desk with his hands on his hips thumbs hooked into the side of his trousers.

"How you doing?" he asked his partner. Olivia removed her reading glasses and looked up at him.

"He looks good for it did he cop yet?"

"No, he's being a hard ass but I know if I paraded a woman in a skirt and fish net stockings with stiletto heels he'd cream his overalls in a New York minute." Nick hunched himself to the side of her desk, a few inches from her ear. "You don't by chance happen to have a spare outfit in your locker would ya?" Olivia scrunched her brows at him.

"No," she looked at him chuckling. "Annnd Munch would have my ass in a sling if I went in there before seeing psych."

"Right, sorry." He lifted up from her desk.

"Appreciate the offer though." She added giving him a quirk of a smile. She turned in her chair to face him now.

"Tell ya what, leave him in the box, make up something, that'll give me time to go see psych then go home and change and come back then walk him through the squad room and let him have a nice look but if he tries to cut off my foot or ruins my good Gucci shoes you owe me hear me Nick?"

"I like-no I love the way you think…partner." Nick said slapping his palms together briskly walking back to the interrogation room.

Olivia took the elevator to the 7th floor and knocked on the door of Doctor Nyguyen.

"Come in." The doctor called. "Olivia, hi come in and have a seat, I've been expecting you, it's nice to meet you I'm Doctor Nyguyen."

"Nice to meet you as well and really had no choice."

"I know cops don't like having their heads shrunk or us doctors poking around but believe me these sessions do help because of the nature of your jobs."

"Is doctor Huang in this office or what?

"He very versed in the field and he wouldn't do anything different than I would."

"I know its just that I want be back out there doing what I do best and having my partners back."

"I understand but I'm not the one who can clear you to be back on the beat that will come from your primary, when do you see your doctor next?"

"Next week, I see her next week."

"And how are you feeling since the accident?"

"You mean do I have flashbacks or night sweats is that what you're asking?"

"Yes and overall physically how do you feel?"

"I do have moments where I will wake up after just falling asleep but no hot or cold sweats. My ribs are still sore but I'm a little more agile now."

"That's good. How are when you are out do you find yourself looking over your shoulder or focusing on a subject too long? Like men of Lewis's stature and physical appearance?"

"No not at all, are you asking about men in general? Your question has nothing relative to other men and no, I don't fear other men and I don't get the heebie jeebies when I see someone who resembles my attacker, I haven't been out of the house a lot lately if you haven't noticed."

"Your physical well being, any headaches or need to continue prescription medication to help you sleep?"

"No I weened myself off of the pain medication a week after I got home from the hospital. I prefer to deal with my pain without the aid of substances." No headaches but I feel tired because Ihaven't put in full days so far."

"Sleeping ok?"

"Yes and no, sometimes it's hard to get back to sleep after waking up in the middle of the night."

"What do you do to try and go back to sleep?"

"Lie there and close my eyes or move to get comfortable again."

"You may want to try some relaxation cd's."

"So noted, thank you."

"Appetite?"

"It's just starting to come back."

"Good. Now that we got the basics out of the way I want you to tell me in detail Olivia please about arresting Mr. Lewis and how you felt about him from day one leading up to your attack." Olivia let out a long sigh looking around the doctor's office. After about an hour half with the doctor her session was over and Dr. Nyguyen thanked Olivia for coming and would forward her report to Captain Cragen.

"How'd it go?" Nick asked her as she came into view.

"It's over." Her eyes were large but her smile was the opposite she told him matter of fact. She grabbed her purse from her drawer and told Nick she'd be back soon.

"Ok, Mr. high heels and stocking fetish will be here."

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo 

Olivia returned and definitely caught the eyes of Nick as he stilled his pen and lifted his eyes to meet hers and then slowly they traveled down her outfit all the way to her shoes when she walked in dressed to the nines. She wore a red satin blouse with just enough cleavage to tease their foot fetish perp, a knee length black skirt hugging every curve where it was supposed to and black pantyhose with the seam all the way up the back of her long beautiful legs. Her outfit was complete with her Dolce and Gabbana stiletto black pumps.

"You ready to play?"

"Am…I…ever," he said getting up circling her.

"Oh please Nick." Olivia laughed at his boyish antics. Olivia caught the eye of her Sergeant as well.

"Going somewhere Liv?"

"No, just going to give our sicko perp an eyeful so he'll come clean of dismembering our victim." Munch lowered his head looking Nick's way.

"Straight out of your play book I would assume huh Nick?"

"Works all the time dangle the bait and the dumb fish takes the hook." Sergeant Munch walked back into Cragen's office.

"Carry on children."

"Go get our boy." Olivia told him. Nick walked Bobby Lee out as she strolled through the entryway.

"I'm looking for Detective Nicholas Amaro." She said in an adopted sultry accent.

"That would be me mam just one second while I take him to lock up. This is my desk why don't you have a seat right here." Nick pulled out the chair for her as Bobby Lee started to salivate. His eyes burned into Olivia and when she sat and crossed her legs tapping her foot in the air Bobby Lee became fixated on her legs.

"Put your tongue back in your mouth Bobby Lee she wouldn't give you the time of day. Let's go."

Nick pulled him by his arm but he strained his neck almost all the way around as he stared at Olivia. Nick thought of another trick as they reached the cage.

"Aw man you know what? Before they can process you I need a little more information from you Bobby Lee. Back to the room." Olivia thought quickly seeing them come back. She rubbed her fingers along her calf pretending not to notice them as they passed by her a second time.

"Like what you see huh Bobby Lee?"

"Yeah she's a looker alright."

"Detective Amaro I don't have all day now please can I talk with you?" Nick held on to Bobby's arm looking back from Bobby Lee to his partner all the while his perp's eyes were glued to Olivia's leg. He yanked him over to Amanda's desk.

"Yeah sure. Park it and don't make a sound hear me?" He secured the perp to her desk. He walked over to Olivia and they chatted. She continued to rub her calf then take off her shoe and massage her toes. Nick thought he heard a grunt so he turned to look at Bobby Lee. His eyes flickered and rolled upwards.

"So what's your take? Is he about to cave?"

"I can feel it; his blood is pulsating in all the wrong places." Olivia smiled at the sexual innuendo. Nick's hunch was right, Bobby Lee needed to excuse himself to use the little boy's room and relieve himself and it wasn't urine he was expelling in there. He copped to raping Melanie and cutting off her foot. They found the missing foot with the partial stocking and shoe still intact two feet underneath his garage.

"I gotta hand it to you Amaro you have a knack with unusual tactics." Olivia told him after he finished booking Bobby Lee.

"It's what I do," Nick said smiling pulling back the tab on his drink and taking a long swallow.

"Well since that case is now closed I'm going home and change, curl up on my couch and read a good book I've neglected then hopefully catch some zzz's."

"You—look, nice Liv, thanks for your help."

"Don't mention it—night Nick."

"Night." He watched her go admiring how lovely she looked. Other than the red dress he saw her in when she showed up to a crime scene last year, he always knew his partner in nothing but black jeans, colorful, tasteful sweaters and boots. Seeing her dressed up like this nearly took his breath away.

"Hey Liv wait up a sec." Olivia turned to meet him.

"Uh-look I'm really sorry that I…"

"Nick don't say it, you had plans that night I would never ask you to cancel and babysit me, you know me better than that."

"I know—I just feel so-" Olivia held up her palm to him.

"You have nothing to feel guilty about. I'm going to be fine, he's dead."

"Alright, have a nice night." Nick wished her. She smiled at him as she turned and headed out.

"I'm certainly going to try." In the back of the cab ride home she thought, _maybe if Maria had been a little more open with him about her ptsd they would probably still be together and now there's Cynthia who Nick has a child with. She's beautiful and they seem to enjoy each other's company and if they do get together it will be good for all of them. Why can't I find a man like Nick? If he wasn't my partner what would be the odds of us ending up together? One in one million she thought she scoffed._

Fin and Amanda returned and were filled in with the arrest of Bobby Lee Baron.

Hugs,

Jasmine :)


End file.
